Christmas and Thanksgiving were the two holidays when both sides of my family came together to celebrate. With my dad’s Cuban and my mom’s Turkish side of the family, the number of relatives at family gatherings seemed infinite, which caused undeniable tension. While I have endless incredible memories from these holidays, sometimes the chaos overpowered those moments. I never understood how a holiday celebrating happiness and joy ended in unforgettable fights and a flood of tears.
While this sounds sad, and in some ways, it was, such an array of opinions also allowed me to understand how politics affected the people around me at such a young age. I vividly remember the roar of emotions at my 2016 Thanksgiving dinner following the presidential election. Emotions were high and sensitivity was elevated: neither of which mixed well with the passion some of my family holds for politics. I hid in the bathroom while I heard conversations transform into yelling matches followed by slammed doors. Harsh words spread, followed by hurt feelings, leading to an early end of the celebration. That night, I realized the reality of this divide between the Republican and Democratic parties.
After living in a household with a constant divide, I learned how to get by each day without creating tension, but I wondered if “getting by” was what I wanted. As time passed, I felt less comfortable speaking my opinions because of the fear of negative feedback. The idea of an opinion is having your own beliefs and ideas, so why do I continue to feel ashamed for having a certain view? Do I have to hide who I am to “fit in?” These thoughts continued to cross my mind as I had more conversations with people unwilling to hear a different perspective. Having a conversation about politics never felt possible for me because, in my experience, it always ended in tears; but recently, I realized this could change. I felt highly isolated because everyone around me was older and told me my “passion” was too strong and that I was too young to understand politics. This statement deeply affected how I thought about myself and pushed me to start responding to this negativity to make clear that being young does not correlate with knowledge or passion.
On June 26, 2015, the Supreme Court legalized same-sex marriage in all 50 states. Ten-year-old me sat on the floor of my living room playing with my Barbies while the background noise of Fox News echoed something even my young self could not comprehend. How could this just be happening now? A question that took up my entire mind transformed into the moment I wanted to use my voice to speak on important topics because I knew a fight was put up to get where we are today. I was 10 years old when this political passion grew, and I finally understood that to move forward, people need to have uncomfortable conversations. I began speaking to those who would listen about issues I cared about. Eventually, I experienced a conversation where two people with opposing views could speak respectfully and educate each other. That conversation shifted my perspective on politics, regaining some hope for a less divisive future.
My upbringing had contrasting effects on my life, but I see the positive within all of the negativity. Now, I can have amicable discussions without tears being shed; I feel comfortable in my beliefs and accept that not everyone will agree when it comes to politics. This perspective switch has allowed me to continue life without getting too caught up in what everyone believes and start to focus on me. I can now reflect on those chaotic holidays and see that while those days ended in sadness, ultimately, they led me to become a more honest, passionate and determined version of myself, but I look forward to a day when this division between political parties can begin to fade away and start opening our minds to the idea of different opinions.
